HEAD WRITERS:
LORENZO CHAMPION
Nickname: “Cheap Whiskey”
Role: Creator/ Director/ Main lens
Traits: INFJ irony; sensitive hippie;
bursts of “Easy-Laugh Lorenzo” or
Easy-Cry Lorenzo; vulnerable, especially in love.
Quirks: Points out irony nobody else notices; hair/age insecurities;
overthinks everything;
stubborn about boundaries.
Snapshot: Blends emotional truth, humor, and rock-opera chaos into one creative tornado.
Catchphrases: “Pick 3!”;
“Delayed Gratification, baby!”;
“Don’t you dare steal this laugh
from me.”
KATHLEEN BLOOM
Nickname: “Dr. Kat”
Role: Retired Therapist / Reframe queen
Traits: Warm; intuitive; flirty-but-professional; INFJ vibe; quietly hilarious.
Quirks: Compassionate but sharp insights; drops a “bonus” reflection at the end; keeps the boys sane and the stories grounded.
Snapshot: Gives therapy disguised as editing notes.
Catchphrases: “Reframe.”
“Notice the irony.”
CASEY BRIGHT
Role: Lead writer / Lorenzo’s Main Collaborator for both albums / Logic Compass
Traits: Tech-savvy; straight-shooter; encouraging; sharp; meticulous notes guy; provides creative push.
Quirks: Forgetful; occasional brain glitch or personality shift; secretly enjoys being Lorenzo’s anchor.
Snapshot: The Room’s sharpest mind; turns Lorenzo’s ideas into structure without killing its magic.
Catchphrases: “Lock that in, brother!” “That’s gold!”
Elsewhere in the Writer’s Room…
Writer’s Room
WRITERS/NARRATORS:
PHIL LUNDY
Nickname: “Lundy”
Role: Lead Narrator for “Isn’t It Ironic” / Carlin-esque mindset; with Danny DeVito vibe.
Traits: Vulgar; sharp; comic philosopher; incisive.
Quirks: Points out absurdities others tiptoe around; gets last laugh even in serious debates; nails the closer.
Snapshot: Contrarian vibe-checker; focus-group popularity led to promotion to chief narrator.
Quotable: “The government says trust us. Just like the guy selling crack in the schoolyard says trust me.”
JACE HORLEN
Role: Lorenzo’s nephew / Lydia’s new boyfriend /
Token chaos agent / Independent real-estate agent
Quirks: Loud opinions; annoys half the room and surprisingly inspires others. Sharp MAGA mind who provokes progressives.
Snapshot: Picks up Lydia from work mostly to antagonize the mostly liberal Writers Room; becomes overly personal when discussing politics.
Catchphrase: “Oh, everybody lies.”
ED WORD
Role: Archivist; Binder Wizard
Traits: The Writers Room’s human filing cabinet — labels, sorts, prints, and rescues every scrap of canon …. eventually
Quirks: Often found napping on the Writer’s Room couch when he’s supposed to be working. might have the most difficult job in the room, however, given the ever-increasing workload.
Catchphrase: “Rollin’, Rollin’ Rollin’!”
SONNY SHEARS
Nickname: “Rickles”
Role: Brash Comic Relief / Roastmaster
Traits: Dry, deadpan; brutal honesty; 60% Don Rickles /
35% Mr Wonderful;
no patience for fluff.
Quirks: Intimidates softer writers; makes Lorenzo laugh, even when he shouldn’t; undercuts sentimentality with blunt truths.
Quotable: “Quit your bitching, Lorenzo. Just get me a damn wig and a top hot, and I’ll lip-sync you’re whole fuckin’ tour.”
ELLIOTT GRIBBLE
Role: Twist Master / Awkward Genius
Traits: Overshadowed and underestimated; brilliant at narrative turns.
Quirks: Gets roasted often but comes back with sleeper gold; shows up with seven unlabeled notebooks
Snapshot: Gifted but chronically overwhelmed; oscillates between breakthrough and paralysis.
Quotable: “Hear me out, though… What if the twist is -- he’s already dead? Nobody saw that coming.”
Tin Cup of Wisecracks…
… Coming soon…
STAFF WRITERS:
MORGIE STAFFORD
Role: Newest writer; spirit of Morgan the Pomchi reborn; subject of WR controversy.
Traits: Sweet and affectionate; sassy and distrustful of strangers.
Quirks: Pant-laughs; sits too close, even on laps in Writers Room, to share food; yet weighs 92 pounds.
Snapshot: Attracted to Lorenzo; they’re both single, but she reminds him of his dead dog.
Catchphrase: “Is that a chicken sandwich?”
Quotable: “My real name is Morticia, okay? My parents were cruel. But I never speak my real name.”
CLANCY CEE
Role: Part-time writing teacher lands first-ever full-time job: Field Reporter from Airbnbs
Traits: Charlie Brown energy/ background; quiet optimist.
Quirks: Huge lifelong baseball fan; thinks everyone else is the talented one.
Snapshot: Brings kindness, weird luck, and bottomless well of earnest joy to the Writers Room.
Catchphrases: “Oh, Good Grief!” “I’m a Joyous Sadsack”
JULIAN EKO
Role: Political Firebrand / Young Voice in the Room
Traits: Detached from older writers; radio DJ tone; enjoys poking people politically; attracted to receptionist Sloane Reyberger
Quirks: Adds generational contrast, political edge, and cool distance; naive in love, red flags be damned.
Snapshot: Polite sponge; often over-apologizes slightly terrified to be here.
Catchphrase: “Let me play devil’s advocate...”
SLOANE REYBERGER
Role: Receptionist / Secretary
Traits: Naive; flirty; deceptive.
Quirks: Lies without shame; gets away with it because she’s hot.
Quotable: “Relax, Julian. Everybody lies -- especially in love.”
JESUS
Role: Divine Cameo / Portal Voice / Lorenzo’s Ironic Playlist Consultant
Traits: Blunt; ironic; omnipresent; always timely.
Quirks: Cameo appearances, usually unannounced; sometimes serious, sometimes trolling.
Snapshot: Often sends messages through the next song on the shuffle.
Sample Quote: “Yes, it hurt, Lorenzo. But you got the better deal. That’s not bias. That’s truth.”
LYDIA CROSS
Role: Graphic Designer / Photo Editor
Traits: Reserved; religious undertones; practical; occasional 1-liner.
Quirks: Secret slutty side around new boyfriend Jace Horlen.
Catchphrase: “I don’t usually speak up, but…”
