EPISODE 4, SCENE 26:
I Don’t Trust Funny Anymore

[Setting: Kat is sorting through resumes on an actual clipboard. Casey has two mugs. Lorenzo is pacing like he left a song on the stove, then flops into Rickles’ old chair and slowly swivels it.]

LORENZO:
Did Rickles text back yet?

CASEY:
Still on Read.

KAT:
So, Rickles is out... You said hire help. I’m hiring help.
[pauses]
I’m not doing anymore all-nighters with you two men.
I’m too old. Too retired.

LORENZO (half-joking):
Just don’t hire anybody funny. I don’t trust funny anymore.

CASEY (grins):
He’s not funny — he’s Ricklish.

[Phil Lundy enters with a giant iced coffee. He clocks the emotional barometer like a human mood ring.]

PHIL:
Don’t mind me.
I’m just documenting the slow collapse of this emotion-fueled think tank.

KAT (ignoring Phil):
I already booked auditions.
One of them doesn’t believe in laptops.

[She holds up three headshots. One guy’s nickname is PATCH. Another wears a cape.]

KAT:
These people are… weird.
Even for us.

[Lorenzo flips a resume, reads aloud.]

LORENZO:
This woman claims she gets downloads from the moon.

KAT:
This one says: ‘I can only write after walking barefoot through morning dew.’

PHIL (sips coffee):
She’s in.

[Everyone turns to him.]

PHIL:
What? At least she’s honest.

[Lorenzo glances at Kat’s posted job description.]

LORENZO (reads slowly):
“Must be intuitive, emotionally intelligent, fiercely independent, detail-obsessed…”
[pause]
Oh my God!
We’re all INFJs… aren’t we?

KAT:
I thought you knew that.

CASEY (grinning):
Maybe that’s why Rickles never really fit in.

[Everyone goes quiet. Even Phil has a half-smile.]
[Then Morgan lets out a single bark.]

LORENZO:
She’s INFJ, too.
Definitely.

[FADE OUT]

SCENE 27:
Oh, Crap! Forgot a Verse!

[Setting: Lorenzo sits at the bar, tapping his lyric sheet. Casey is rummaging through crates of old vinyl albums.]

LORENZO: (sighing):
You ever think about how many times real artists had that ‘Oh shit—I forgot a verse’ moment?
Like… after the album was already out?

CASEY (not even looking up):
Springsteen cut Fire from Darkness on the Edge of Town.
Dylan left Blind Willie McTell off Infidels.
Joni Mitchell said she had a dozen unfinished songs for Hejira.

LORENZO (blinking):
…You just had all that ready?

CASEY  (shrugs):
You’re not the first guy who thought he could say everything in twelve songs.

LORENZO (sighs): 
Our B-side song: ‘Grief Has Five Names’?

CASEY:
Yeah.

LORENZO:
Turns out grief had six names, in my case.
I forgot that the media company I worked for 30 years eliminated our jobs on January 21….
I was also grieving the fact I had lost my job a couple years earlier.

CASEY :
Brother…if you think you got it all on the first try, you’re either lying to yourself or you’re done making art.

[Lorenzo stares. Then nods, quietly. A single tear strolls down his cheek.]

CASEY:
You never get it all into one record.
Not even the pros. 
Especially not the pros.
You finish mixing. 
You send it off for mastering. 
You breathe a sigh of relief….
And then you wake up at 3am:
‘Holy shit—I forgot the sixth verse…the one that explains everything.’

LORENZO:
But I thought I had this one right, Crabman.

SCENE 28:
***MUSICAL NUMBER: “Grief ‘s Got Five Names”***

[Lorenzo quietly returns to sit with Casey.]

LORENZO:
Maybe we could write another song about this on the next album?
I miss those people.
[pause]
Please?

CASEY:
Exactly! Sometimes that “Oh shit, I forgot grief has six names” moment is the seed of the next record.
That shows your process is real.

LORENZO:
Let’s call it: ‘The Other Goodbye.’

[FADE OUT]

SCENE 29:
Send In The Freaks

[Setting: Empty coffee cups. Audition folders everywhere. Kat’s hair is slightly frizzed. Lorenzo is face-down on the couch. Casey eats peanut butter straight from the jar with a spoon.]

LORENZO (muffled into the pillow):
That guy who said ‘my trauma writes for me’ — was that a poem or a threat?

CASEY (deadpan):
I still think we could use Patch.
(beat)
Just… not for anything involving… sentences.

KAT:
He asked if we provide health insurance. I told him: ‘Only for the dog.’

LORENZO:
We were being Punked, right?

CASEY (shifts tone — serious):
I wish…. But honestly — do we need someone right now?
Or are we just trying to replace Rickles… because it’s awkward?

[A long, collective pause.]

KAT (softly)
We need help.
Just not… chaos in a cape.

[Quietness. Kat sips tea, now seated cross-legged on the floor. Casey stares off, dazed. Lorenzo is reclined, shoeless, scribbling notes on the back of a headshot. The room feels calm, used, and weirdly cozy.]

KAT (to Casey):
Today took years off my life, babe.

CASEY:
Let’s be honest.
What do we actually need?
Not just skills — energy-wise.”

LORENZO:
Stability. Quiet confidence.
And maybe someone who doesn’t ask if the loft is haunted.

[Phil Lundy enters, holding a kombucha, already judging them.]

PHIL:
Okay, but the guy with the cape?
He was funny.

KAT:
Phil, this is not open-mic night.
This is a functioning creative team.

PHIL:
Define ‘functioning.’

LORENZO:
And the woman who whispered her loglines like spells?

CASEY (grim):
I think I may have accidentally hired her.
I said, ‘Cool, let’s stay in touch.’
She replied, ‘We already are.’

[They all freeze.]
ALL (in unison):
Aww, Hell no!

[FADE OUT]

SCENE 30:
Sentimental Overtime

[Setting: The crew is scattered around the studio. Kat is cross-legged on the floor scribbling lyrics, Phil is thumbing through a battered set list. Lorenzo and Casey sit side-by-side on a battered loveseat, a single lamp burning overhead.)

LORENZO:
You do realize I’ve never cared much for fiction.
Never liked musicals either.
So, how the fuck did I find myself writing a semi-fictional musical --
at my age?

[Everyone stares at him.]

LORENZO:
I guess I’m not retired anymore, am I, Crabman?

CASEY (smiles):
Nah. But you’re finally getting paid in something besides emotional trauma.

LORENZO: (voice soft, a little cracked):
Casey…can I say something that’s probably gonna embarrass me?

[Casey looks up, amused]
CASEY:
When has that ever stopped you?

LORENZO (ignores him, voice warming):
You know, we keep calling each other ‘brother.’ …
And I was thinking, some people probably hear that, and think it’s just some … corny hippie thing we say.

[Casey tips his head, listening.]

LORENZO:
But I was trying to put my finger on why that word feels right.
And I realized…it’s because I’d define a brother as somebody who has your best interests at heart.
Somebody that’s on your team, no matter how many times you screw up or get sentimental.
Somebody who knows you at your worst and… still sticks around.”

[The room goes quiet. Even Phil looks up, surprised.]

PHIL (dry):
Jesus. Somebody get me a tissue.

KAT (smiling):
That might be the most sincere thing I’ve heard in here all week.

CASEY (voice low, warm):
Thanks, Lorenzo. That means a lot.
And for the record…you’re my brother, too.

[Lorenzo tries to brush it off with a shrug but can’t stop smiling.]

CASEY (clearing his throat, trying to lighten the mood):
Just promise me when you write this scene, you’ll make me sound about 15% cooler than I really am.

LORENZO (laughs, with tears in eyes):
Deal. But I’m keeping the part where I got sentimental.
Somebody’s gotta keep reminding people this is the good stuff.

[Casey lifts his coffee mug in a little toast.]

CASEY:
To brothers:
The ones you’re born with…and the ones you find.”

[They clink mugs. Phil groans theatrically.]

[In the final silence, Morgan gives a tail thump and soft bark — a nod to her INFJ status and emotional radar.]

[FADE OUT]

SCENE 31:
Song on the Radio

[Setting: The Writers Room. Late-night. Empty takeout boxes. Low light, soft laughter. The glow of success and exhaustion.]

KAT:
Alright, confession time.
First time you heard one of our songs on the radio —
where were you, what’d you do, what’d you feel?
Be honest.

CASEY:
I was grading student lyrics. Radio humming in the background.
Then someone texted a clip: “Congrats, you sold out.”
I listened twice, trying to find the part that proved it.

LORENZO:
I was in line at the pharmacy.
Lady ahead of me started singing along to the chorus of Grief’s Got Five Names.
I swear, Jesus has a marvelous sense of humor.

CASEY:
I felt… relief.
Like maybe the universe actually took dictation this time.

LORENZO:
First time I heard Cheap Whiskey on the radio,
the DJ butchered our name — “Lorenzo and the Cheap Whiskeys.”
Still counts.

KAT: (laughing)
I was in my yoga studio.
Whole class froze in plank pose when that riff hit.
I pretended not to know the band —
then grinned through the entire cooldown.
Texted you idiots: “It’s official — Jesus works in A&R!”

CASEY:
That’s why it worked.
We didn’t make a hit — we made a mirror.

KAT:
To mirrors that talk back.

[They clink bottles.]

LORENZO:
Cheap Whiskey: hydrating the soul… since accidentally.

[Soft laughter, then silence — three people quietly realizing how far they’ve come.]

SCENE 32:
Then Why Is There a Donut in My Hand?

[Setting: Kat sits cross-legged on the couch. There’s a whiteboard behind her: “Audition Notes — DO NOT ERASE!” Casey is on the floor with his laptop, but clearly done. Lorenzo is propped against the armrest. Empty coffee cups, random resumes, and a single uneaten donut on a napkin nearby.]

CASEY:
Dude with the Lions jacket cried during his own introduction.

LORENZO (perking up):
You mean I’m not the only one who cries at introductions? Yaaay!

KAT (without missing a beat):
Hey, ‘Easy Cry Lorenzo’ is going to outlive us all. 
You’re sixty pounds lighter now and ten years freer. 
That’s not weakness, man…. That’s spiritual muscle.

CASEY:
Then he said: ‘I just want a place where I can feel safe taking creative risks.’

LORENZO:
I kinda liked him. But did you look at his writing clips, though?
(makes face)
Yiiikes!

KAT:
We didn’t find anyone today, did we?

CASEY:
But we did find something.

LORENZO (perking up):
What? Like how long can we fake being impressed?

KAT:
It’s not about energy.
It’s about intuition.
None of them were listening.

CASEY:
I keep thinking about that long-haired kid.
He was either getting ignored or bumped into while he was trying to read. Barely spoke to anybody but me, but he seemed solid.

LORENZO:
Did he leave any clips?

[They check the sign-in sheet: Julian Eko]

[TEN MINUTES LATER]
[Casey fell asleep sitting up. Kat is talking to herself. Lorenzo is speaking to Morgan like she’s the only sane one.]

[Lydia Cross, the new part-time secretary, enters — silent, precise — and sets down a single folder with a sticky note on it.]

LYDIA:
He’s waiting downstairs.

LORENZO:
Who?

[MOMENARY FADE]

VOICE (Off Screen):
You’re gonna miss me.

[Lights up. Standing in the doorway — same bald head, same crooked grin — is Sonny “Rickles” Shears . He’s holding a half-eaten donut in one hand and his original contract in the other.]

RICKLES:
Let’s face it, people.
You’ve auditioned the galaxy.
But there’s only one Ricklish.

CASEY (half-growling):
You’re not re-hired.

RICKLES (holding up the donut like it’s Excalibur):
Then why is there a donut in my hand?

[They all freeze. Even Morgan tilts her head.]

[BLACKOUT]

[END OF EPISODE 4]

“Then why is there a donut in my hand?”